Have yourself a Merry Little Christmas

Merry Christmas. Today was my first Christmas with a family of my own. WE have Jeff's children for the week, and Santa Claus came to our house! We're now in Oklahoma--far away from my family. I am missing my family something fierce! But at least I wasn't alone this Christmas. I am loved, and I was with those that I love and who love me! Santa Claus brought Samantha and Tyler bicycles! Then, Tyler said: "We need to go outside and check to see if Santa left tracks with his sleigh!" So glad Santa didn't disappoint! He walked outside to find sleigh tracks and even bells that had fallen from the sleigh during the hard landing! We were able to open Christmas presents with my mom and family via Skype. That was a blessing because I miss them so much. Snow was in the forecast for today. That made me excited, since I couldn't go to Alabama for Christmas. But, wouldn't you know it-- the snow storm shifted south-- and it snowed an hour south of us! We didn't even see a flurry. I hope all of you have had a wonderful Christmas.

I'm Back!

Hello, all of my blogging friends. After quite the hiatus, I am back! Let me update you a bit on the last several months! Well, in June, I got married! I still can't believe it! All these years waiting for that special someone to come along turned out to be someone I already knew! So, for everyone out there who has given up on love-- don't! It will happen! Well, that's just the beginning. About six weeks about my husband and I decided we needed to be close to his children to be in their lives while they grow up. So... we moved to Oklahoma! Quite the change from Chattanooga, Tennessee! I still miss Chattanooga everyday, but Claremore, Oklahoma, is a nice town. It's about 30 miles from Tulsa, and known for many famous people-- Will Rogers and Patty Page, just to name a couple! The only thing I really hate about Claremore are the trains. There are two lines that run through town and there's no escaping the sound of the whistle! Plus, you can't drive through town without seeing a train or getting stopped by one! The people in Oklahoma aren't nearly as friendly as down south, but I expected that before I came. It is nice to be close to the kids, though. Samantha is 8 (going on 16) and Tyler is 6. We get to spend half the month with them each month, which is nice, but it's also hard for me! I'm not used to being a mom! On top of everything, I quit my job. I'm trying the stay-at-home gig for a while, and let me tell you: it's harder than it seems! I haven't quite got the art of keeping the house clean yet. But I know I'll figure it out! So as you can see, my life is totally different than it was a year ago. Sometimes I miss my old life, but I love my new life and wouldn't trade it for the world! ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- When will the resting ancestor toe the line on top of the killer? (Don't ask! Just had to put this on here for something new I'm doing!)

Crazy Busy

Right now, my entire life is consumed with planning a wedding. I knew it would be a lot of work, but I guess I really didn't realize exactly how much work! Today, I made the centerpieces for my reception. Jeff and I also visited a gourmet doughnut shop to discuss a groom's cake.

We're also trying to move into a two bedroom apartment before the wedding so we can have room for his children, who will be spending the summer with us. So today, we went and looked at twin mattresses for their room. We haven't bought any yet!

So we have a million things going on at once, and I just want a day to enjoy without any wedding planning... that's coming tomorrow. I took off work tomorrow since Jeff is off. We are spending the entire day together-- no wedding planning allowed! I'm very much looking forward to it!

Oh, we got our engagement pictures done... above is one of those pictures, but you can view them all here. Enjoy!

The Heron and the Fisherman

I live in Chattanooga, Tennessee, and the Tennessee River runs right through downtown. It's a wonderful place just to go walk. Very peaceful. Like many cities you're not sure what you might find when you get there. Jeff and I were on a date tonight, just enjoying each other's company. We had just got out of the movie theatre, and decided to take a walk along the riverfront. Once we had walked awhile, we took a seat, not knowing we were about to get the most wonderful entertainment. It's the one time I wish I would have remembered to bring my camera, because it would have made for some great pictures. There was a fisherman sitting along the water. He had two poles. Well in comes this Heron. It flew in and stood close to the fisherman. The man got up and moved around, but surprisingly, the bird didn't move. Jeff and I just watched in amazement. We couldn't believe the heron wasn't afraid. The fishermen continued to do his own thing, seemingly ignoring the bird. Then all of a sudden, he got a fish on one of his poles! It was hilarious! The bird reminded me of my dog, just hoping for some crumbs from the table. It walked closer to the fisherman, pacing back and forth as he pulled the fish out of the water... Then it came closer, as to say "Please share". And the man did something we didn't expect. He threw the fish to the bird. You would have thought the bird had struck gold! It hurried over to the fish, pounced on it, and then ate it in one gulp. We were so happy to see this. But the fisherman wasn't done. He proceeded in the following minutes to pull two more fish out of the water-- and the same scene commenced. The bird seemingly helped him fish, watching the water probably only about eight feet from the fisherman. After it got three fish, it stayed for a few more minutes, keeping the man company, and then spread its wings and flew away.

This was one of the sweetest scenes I have ever witnessed, and it makes me smile thinking about it. The fisherman wasn't greedy. He was willing to share.

Many people stopped to watch the scene as they walked by. I'm just glad I got to be a part of it.

Planning a Wedding!!!!

Okay, so I realize I haven't posted in quite a while! It's amazing what happens when you're with the one you want to spend the rest of your life with! It seems you don't have time for things, like blogging!

So, Jeff officially proposed on January 27th! And we're getting married on June 2! I am so excited! It seems my life is finally coming together. My whole life I've dreamed about the one that would make me the happiest woman alive-- and I have found that in Jeff. He loves me and shows me he loves me every single day!

So we're planning a wedding, and we're also preparing for his kids arrival. They will get here just before the wedding and will be with us all summer. I'm jumping in with both feet, and I'm ready for the ride!

We're getting engagement pictures done tomorrow. Once we get those, I'll try to take the time to post a few.

I'll also try to document more on my blog. I think I'll probably wish I'd taken the time if I don't!

Thoughts going into 2012

It's the beginning of another year. 2012 is here. While many celebrate the arrival of the new year, I always hate to see the old year go. A new year always means another year gone. It means you're a year older. It means the year will always be a memory.

This year, I was definitely sad to see 2011 go, but I am looking forward to my 2012. While many say 2011 was a bad year, I say it was one of my best ever. In January, my high school sweetheart contacted me out of the blue. We started talking on the phone, and fell back in love. In March, Jeff came for a visit. Along for the ride, his two children. Two months later, in May-- Jeff moved to Chattanooga. We decided to get married, and we plan to tie the knot on June 2, 2012.

Through it all, there have been ups and downs. I love Jeff with all my heart, but every single day I wonder if I can really be a good wife. I also wonder every day if I can be a part-time mom to his children. I feel so inadequate, and truthfully, they drive me nuts much of the time. But I do love them.

I call it the 30-year-old curse. Let me explain: I've been on my own, and all alone, since I moved out of my mother's house at age 18. Just a few weeks ago, I turned 33. For years, I've longed for the companionship of a man, a family. But during that time, I got used to being alone, even coveting that alone time. So now that I finally do have what I've prayed for my entire life, I miss my time by myself, and even get upset when it's nowhere in sight. I find that I am hard to get along with during these times, and truthfully, I don't know why Jeff sticks around. But if he ever did leave I would hate it! I love him! I love his kids. I just don't love having them around every waking minute!

Now please don't think I don't want to marry Jeff. I am sharing my thoughts, and I don't want any backlash. I wish I could figure out how to fix this problem. I don't want to be alone, and I know Jeff is the man God has for me. He and I were always supposed to be together. Neither one of us realized it until later in life! I just have to figure out how to get my coveted alone time, and still be part of a family. Because truthfully, when we have the kids, I am exhausted from the time they get here until the time they leave, and I just want to close the door and not hear little voices...

Just so you know, I love children, which is why this baffles me. I even teach the kids church at my church! So, I'm doing a whole lot of praying-- hoping that God will show me how to do life as a family. I guess I just don't know how!

Happy New Year everyone-- For me the next five months will be very busy-- planning my wedding. I just hope it all comes together and Jeff and I can live happily ever after.

The True Meaning of Christmas

And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow, puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so?
It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags.
And he puzzled and puzzled 'till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before.
What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store.
What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.
~ Dr. Seuss

It does mean more! It means love for one another. It means family. Most of all, it means Jesus! Here's what happened:


Luke 2
The Birth of Jesus
1 In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. 2 (This was the first census that took place while Quirinius was governor of Syria.) 3 And everyone went to their own town to register.
4 So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. 5 He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child. 6 While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, 7 and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no guest room available for them.

8 And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. 9 An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. 10 But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. 11 Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. 12 This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.”

13 Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying,

14 “Glory to God in the highest heaven,
and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.”

15 When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let’s go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about.”

16 So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger. 17 When they had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, 18 and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. 19 But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. 20 The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told.

21 On the eighth day, when it was time to circumcise the child, he was named Jesus, the name the angel had given him before he was conceived.



Merry Christmas everyone!

"A Heart Most Worthy" Book Review

It's 1918. Three young women, all from different areas of Italy, came to America for a better life. They all got a job at a dress maker's shop. This is the story of those three women, and how they found a life for themselves. Two of the women come from not-so-wealthy backgrounds. The other chose a life of poverty when she moved to America, in order to hide. She and her grandmother are running for their lives! But that life of poverty proves to be quite the hardship! Would they survive?

A Heart Most Worthy, by Siri Mitchell is a slow-starting book. It starts in Italy, for background purposes. I don't tend to like books that do that because I tend to forget as the story unfolds. But I'm glad I stuck with this book. It was very good. I found myself routing for the characters... as one of them gets very sick, as another is running from a murderer. And as they each discover love.

I would recommend this book to anyone that likes fiction set in historic eras. Some parts of it are very predictable, as are most love stories. But others really caught me by surprise.

Bethany House provided me with a copy of this book for review.

Need help!

I've been trying to leave comments on many of your blogs, but everytime I try, blogger says I don't have access to your blog! Anyone know a solution to this problem. It's all of them, not just one or two.

Any help would be appreciated. thanks!

The Best and the Worst of Summer (so far)

Okay, so I know that I haven't posted anything since May. I have to tell you, over the last few months, my life has been turned upside down. But I believe it's all been for the better.

In the Spring, I told you about Jeff. Well, Jeff moved to Chattanooga in May. I absolutely love having him here, but at times I just want to be left alone, too. I guess that's because I am 32 years old and always been single. I mean, I've had boyfriends, but never someone like Jeff, whom I am around a lot and seem to miss when I'm not with him.


Well, as if the change of having Jeff move to Chattanooga wasn't enough, his children (Samantha, 7, and Tyler, 5) came in June, and they've been here for the entire summer. As a matter of fact, we still have three weeks before they go home! Now, Jeff does have his own apartment. But I keep the kids every morning until I go to work so we can cut down on child care costs. That has been quite the challenge for me, to say the least. I have learned that I very much like my "alone time," and I miss it VERY much! Some days I find myself in such a bad mood because I just want to be by myself! But we are having a good time, for the most part, and I love Jeff dearly. So, I'm trying to teach myself to be part of a family and not a "loner". I am also utilizing my time after I get off work to enjoy the quiet I long for much of the time. That's why it's 1:30am and I'm still awake. I work second shift, and I get off at midnight. So, the last 1 1/2 hour has been mine!

I haven't done hardly any exercising this summer-- except chase after Samantha and Tyler. So, my weight loss stands at 22 pounds. I plan to get back at it as soon as they leave. We are starting this thing at my church called "Run For God". It's supposed to teach you to train for a 5k physically and spiritually. So, we'll see how it goes. My goal is to do a 5k before year-end.

I also haven't done much reading. I'm hoping to have a book review for you soon, but adding children to life is HARD! I have so much respect for all of you moms out there, because I'm not sure God made me to be a mom. I just don't feel very good at it. But I am trying!

So, I write all of this to tell you, I'm back, and I'm going to try and get better at my blogging. I hope all of you are having a good summer!

"Unsinkable: A Young Woman's Courageous Battle on the High Seas"

Imagine this: You're 16 and you've been dreaming of something for the last three years. It's a lifelong goal of sorts, and you're just brave enough to try it now! That's the true story in this book. Abby Sunderland has been sailing with her family since she was a baby. Her family spent more time on the water than on dry land. Abby grew up loving the adventure of it all. She was very skilled at captaining a boat even as young as 13... so she decided she wanted to sail around the world, alone. This book is part biography, part autobiography. We get to hear from Abby about how she was thinking, how she was feeling, as she set sail alone. There were some very good times for her out on the water. But then you get to see just how afraid she was when things finally went terribly wrong!

I remember this story in the news. Many were like, "what are her parents thinking?" I remember being afraid for this California teenager, but thinking that I would hope as a parent one day that I would be able to support my children in whatever dreams they have.

I really liked this book in many ways. I am a news producer by profession. This story took me beyond the news, to see the real people and their real story. There were some things I didn't like about the book, however. It goes into great detail about different problems with the boat, or different things about the boat. I know nothing about sailing, and I found these details weighed the story down a bit. SO, truthfully, I found myself skimming through these parts. But if you can get past that, the story is amazing.

WHile many thought it was crazy for Abby's parents to allow her to sail around the world, this was a great learning experience for her... and her faith became much stronger.

At the end of the book, she makes a very huge realization. One that everyone could learn from... She said,

"A lot of times the things that are most worth doing involve risk,
and I'm living proof that not everything works out the way you planned.
But I have learned an important truth: In stepping out and trying to
achieve great things, the only way I can truly fail is never to try at all."

I took a trip to the small north Alabama town of Ider on Friday, to see the tornado destruction there. It's a little less than an hour from Chattanooga. You can read about my trip here.

Praising God in the Storm

Last Wednesday brought 18 tornadoes to the Chattanooga area alone. There is total devastation in many towns in our area. 73 people just in our area alone died in those storms. It is heartbreaking. I work in television news, so we see and hear a lot that the general public doesn't. As we rode out the storms at the TV station, our meteorologist spent the long day on air telling folks when to take cover. For me, as for many of you, it was a day full of anxiety...a day full of prayer. I spent much time asking God to please protect Chattanooga. As the day went on, we got word that parts of Alabama had been devastated as well. Tuscaloosa, where my mom, stepdad brothers, and friends live, just devastated. My co-workers told me, "Nicole, call your family... make sure they're okay." So I did. I was so happy when my step-dad answered the phone. Nearby where my dad and stepmom live-- same type story. But everyone is okay there as well.

So, as the night progressed, the storms got worse here in the Tennessee Valley. We learned after a really bad round, folks were trapped in homes in three different towns in our area. People were dying because no one could get to them. Rescue workers had to leave neighborhoods where people were screaming for help to take cover from another tornado. In our newsroom, we listened to all of this on the scanners. It was heartbreaking. As a journalist, I can usually put up a wall... to keep from feeling anything in sad stories, but Wednesday. April 27th, 2011, was just too much. I broke down-- and cried-- on more than one occasion.

I know how difficult it can be to praise God in the storm. I've been there. When the worst happens. When you believe God for a miracle and that miracle doesn't happen. When you trust Him with your whole heart and you don't get the answer you were looking for. Luckily my family and myself are safe. We didn't receive damage. We were lucky. But my prayer tonight is that those who were affected, those who lost their homes-- or worse-- lost someone they loved-- will run to the Lord, not run away. Because He is our refuge in time of need. He loves us. Despite the circumstances, He loves us. There were entire families who died together in this storm. I just can't imagine. I pray tonight that Jesus will wrap His arms around those who are hurting and give them peace.

My Heart Aches for a Family

Life is so good right now. I don't know how to put it in writing. It's amazing what a little love will do for one's heart. I'm loving the way I feel since Jeff came into my life. Just to think, some people never experience the love of a life partner... and that's sad. It makes me sad that it's taken me this long to experience it, and that I had decided I was going to be single the rest of my life. I am so glad God had better plans!

I've been reading another blog... it's a blog written by the wife of one of my high school band directors. Click here to read it. She blogs about his cancer, and the struggles they go through in day to day life as a family, dealing with sickness. I hurt for them. I hurt for him, but I hurt for her just as much. This man that she loves more than anything is very sick, and he's been sick for a very long time. I just pray that my future family never has to go through that.

Many of you know because of prior posts that my brother died of cancer (Leukemia) when he and I were teenagers. The struggle we went through at that time scarred me for life. And then last year, my grandmother went through quite the battle of her own with ovarian cancer. She's now with my brother walking the streets of Gold. I don't want to ever want to have to say that filthy word again when it pertains to my family. Cancer. It's a scary word. It takes away so much. I just have to believe that God knows how much I've been through and won't ever make me go through that again.

When I finally have the family that I've long desired, I want us to live Happily Ever After. I know there will be bumps in the road. But I want to keep sickness away. It really affects me when I read the Swinney's blog . I pray for them, but I pray for my future family every time as well. I've waited so long to love and be loved that I won't accept an early departure from this world for either of us.

Monday's Moment

This morning, Jeff called me to tell me good morning. What a great way to start off the work week! I never thought I'd know what it feels like to truly be loved. I'd given up on ever having that companion with whom I'd share my life. Today, I sit here, and I still feel like I'm in a dream.

These Are a Few of my Favorite Things

I thought since the title of my blog is all about my favorite things, I would share some of my favorites. This is by no means a complete list, and they are not in order of importance.

1. A summer rain--it's peaceful, and it smells so good-- then the air feels clean afterwards.
2. A child's laughter
3. Flowers--I love all flowers, but my favorites are Tulips, Lilies, and Roses
4. Sports Cars-- Mustang(I have one) and the new Camaro
5. Along with #4-- Driving fast!
6. Being pampered-- Massages, pedicures, manicures, facials
7. Travel
8. Country music--not all country, but a lot of it.
9. Facebook--especially when I get on and there are lots of messages there for me
10. Good Pictures-- I love to reminisce, and pictures speak a thousand words
11. The beach-- my favorite place!
12. The mountains-- yes I love the mountains, too! Just something about being surrounded by nature
13. A surprise phone call from a good friend
14. Good Surprises that make me feel all fuzzy inside


Like I said-- this is not a complete list-- but I hope to add to it over time :)
Hope all of you are having a wonderful Sunday!

Living in a Dream World

The last two months I have been living in a dream world. At least that's the way it feels. For my entire life, I have longed to find that person that would make me complete. Tonight, I believe I may have found him.

Many times I am very cautious about telling people that I'm dating, because truthfully, dating never goes that well for me. I'm a runner. I tend to run as soon as things start getting a little serious. I'm reminded of the Julia Roberts/Richard Gere movie, "Runaway Bride". Except I never get anywhere near a wedding. I thought this was strange, until tonight, when I was at a singles group with friends, and one of the women said that very same thing. That's she's that way. I told her about me, and she immediately wanted to know how I fixed it. Well, I haven't completely fixed it, but I do know I'm not running this time. My friend, Matt, put it the best way-- it's a fear of being vulnerable that causes some people to run, and thus seals their fate as a single person. Like I said, the running is finally over for me.


Allow me to introduce you to Jeff. Jeff and I were high school sweethearts. We broke up when I was like 20-- and totally lost contact with each other. But now he's back in my life, and I see a bright future...one that I never imagined could happen. I have been careful not to tell people about our relationship-- I was even scared to title it. But yesterday, I decided it would be okay to put a title on it. SO, yes, Jeff is my boyfriend, and he couldn't be happier. I couldn't be happier. And yes, that scares the living daylights out of me. But there comes a time where you have to stop being afraid and trust God that he's leading you in the right direction. I do trust God. I also trust Jeff. He knows me so well, and I really do believe that he's not going anywhere--that he cares for me in a way no one every has.

So, if I'm dreaming-- please let me sleep, because I don't want to wake up.

My Vacation

My cruise to Mexico was AMAZING!!! We cruised out of Mobile, Alabama, on a five day cruise to Cozumel and Calica. Calica is in the Mayan Riviera-- just south of Playa del Carmen. I loved both of these stops so much. And the cruise itself was so great! On the boat, Val and I met two wonderful ladies--We had lots of fun with Amber and Amy.



It was great because they were a lot like us, so Amber went dancing and to parties with me, while Amy hung out with Valerie-- since the two of them weren't into those types if things...That was great because there were several things I would have been doing alone had we not met them!



Cozumel was great-- We spent the morning shopping and the afternoon at the beach. I won a diamond and saffire necklace in a raffle at Cozumel-- it was set up by our cruise... and I still can't believe I won. When I tried to take my good luck to Bingo, it didn't follow. Oh well.



In Cozumel, we ate at a little place called Pancho's... I drank the best Margarita I've ever had there!






At the Calica port, we chose to visit the Mayan Ruins of Tulum-- or Ruines Mayas de Tulum. They were spectacular! And the water there was so blue--much different than the water in Cozumel. So we toured the ruins, then went swimming! And iguanas were everywhere-- just posing for people's cameras!






I truly love cruising and would love to continue this type of travel in the future. It offers so much fun at a very good price. I highly recommend it to anyone. I'm so glad for my cruising buddy, Valerie! Wonder where we'll go next?

Vacation is on the Horizon!

I'm dreaming of crystal blue waters, white sandy beaches, and a big boat sailing into the Caribbean. But I won't be dreaming much longer! Monday, I leave Mobile, Alabama's, port for Cozumel and Playa del Carmen. I'm so excited! I'll give you a full report once I get back, along with pictures. God gave me this cruise, I have no doubt! He saw how much I needed a vacation-- just to get away! I won't be using Internet or phone on my trip...it will be total relaxation. Hasta luego! Voy a la playa! Estoy tan emocionada!

A Defeated Spirit

From time to time, I realize that life sucks. I've shared this before...when I was a child, I would say to my mom when she made me do something I didn't want to do... "It's not fair." She would always reply, "Life's not fair." I never realized the truth in her statement, until the last few years. Life's not fair. You work hard, do everything you're supposed to do, and someone else will always be favored more than you. I've had a really hard day today, and I just want to scream, "But it's not fair!!!!!!!!!!" Then I hear my mother's words echoing in my ears...and thank her for telling me that early. People tell me all the time how strong I am. I'm not. I'm just a woman, who tries to be strong, since I'm living this life single. But fear is a real thing for me. It's something that I fight on a daily basis. Always have. Days like today don't help. I feel so defeated today. Maybe I'm taking everything that happened today way out of proportion, I don't know. I do know how angry I've been all day, upset, and heartbroken...two very different issues affecting me two very different ways. All I keep wishing is I wouldn't have had to come home to an empty house tonight. Oh the joys.

I need you, Lord. Very much tonight. You are my refuge, a shelter in whom I trust. Be my fortress. My comforter. My peace. My everything.